Will try your advices. Say 'I love you'. I have been with my husband for, three years (new marriage) and he complains quite a bit about not having enough of sexual activity, we literally have sex in the morning, quickies in the afternoon, and usually hardcore sex at night, 3 times a day 5 days a week, I feel we keep our love life Spicy but he still complains on wanting more, i have expressed to him, Im tired and maybe we should cut down the sex to two times days a day compared to three, his reply was, well we can subitute sex with oral sex in the afternoon, now Im to the point where I dont want have no sexual activity at allhe wasnt like this while we were dating, My wife ration me for sex if she gives me today the next one is about two or three weeks but when I speak about sex she says thats all you have in your head but when we have it she enjoys It. This post is speaking to women who use sex as a punishment or withhold from laziness or selfishness. This is my wifes second marriage and my first. To be honest though if it had lasted 15 minutes Id probably have puked. Thats how we started. If you struggle with being sexually playful, then youre just going to have to get out of your comfort zone and try something. Is it because you would cheat given the slightest opportunity in a dancing situation? Our you following my gist here??? The modern dance is a social function. attraction cant be faked or created out of thin air. In fact, it is not marriage. A marriage counselor in Minnesota is encouraging couples to spend time together, the StarTribune reports. She may not be out looking to pick up guys, but be sure that there are guys out there trying to pick her up. 3. Also I have noticed that good Christian women who start blogs to try and help wives understand they should participate more in sex with their husbands are under attack from WOMEN. All you have to do is call them in the middle of the day when they are least expecting your call, say that you love them, and cut the call with a chuckle. However, I am sure that many of you are thinking, Yeah, but there is a lot of dancing that isnt like this. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. 1 Corinthians 7. Again, since she didnt like to cook, I made dinner each night. James 4:4 states know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? Then come together again so that Satanwill not tempt youbecause of your lack of self-control. Yep, that's the only advice I'd give you too. These people are my great friends, hes met almost all of them, and he knows that I feel no one measures up to him anyway. Thanks for any feedback. Prison. * When I dance, it makes me more physically and mentally healthy. It makes me so sad, because I feel like my enjoyment days are numbered. The basic answer is that it's impossible to sin by lusting after your spouse because, within the covenant of marriage, God gives us an enormous amount of freedom to express our desire for one . 1Corinthians 7:1-11 is what I adhere to. This is a very loaded topic and my response is completely unrelated but somewhat related to withholding sex. It is usually assumed jealousy is always a sin. The only thing weve done together is get married. Im not trying to paint a picture that it was me doing all of the work and being mistreated. Here are 5 ways to sexually please your husband, I Think the Proverbs 31 Wife Liked Being On Top, 3 Reasons Your Husband Likes it When You Climax. Very Good I saw this really great post today. These fleshly lusts are said to war or fight against the soul. God bless all of you and Happy Easter. 4. So she gets back from getting a drink and I am upset. I always feel like Im going to disappoint him especially when it comes to oral sex. The modern dance is a social function. Hes even a bit more endowed than my husband though they were both on the large size 8+ (sorry if TMI) I recently found my journal I kept the year before I left my 1st husband. This is all a part of our respect and intimacy for each other. There is no getting around this. Thats where we can confidently embrace sexual intimacy for all it is worth. I wish it could have been under better circumstances. I often feel like many of my personal failures, which I beat myself up for, might have been avoided if my wife had helped me feel more like a man. There is nothing wrong with praying for your spouse in this subject area and theres nothing wrong with praying for this part of your marriage! So she set up counceling for herself with a female at some other church. We offer a Free Private lesson to help you get started having fun and getting more enjoyment out of life . It can be translated as "to desire" or "to . Click HERE. It can become a stumbling block , causing a man to focus on sexual thoughts instead of pure thoughts. The word yield there is very significant. Other blogs are also dropping the defense of men to avoid being assaulted verbally by women? Keeping these things in mind, I believe that a huge part of dancing today breaks these rules. We specialize in all the partner ballroom dances and help you build confidence and comfort on the dance floor for cruises, weddings, latin nightclub dancing or any event that has music. The sin would have more to do with obstinate and unreasonable rejection of one of the purposes and functions of marriage. What made it ok was that we were both there. Now, Im not saying sex and fun shouldnt mingle closely. And he insists on trying to turn me on. So the first thing that we need to ask ourselves in answer to this question is this: am I going to have an attitude that seeks to avoid any questionable decisions in my life and the appearance of impropriety? I know Im not perfect. Amazon, Go to company page Years ago I thought he was gay or had some sweet little thing on the side! Thatd get predictible and thats what we dont need! Love is not self-seeking and it is patient. The whole point of a lap dance is to drive your partner crazy with anticipation and desire. However, it was not very long before one of them was engaged in an adulterous situation and the church was moved to withdraw fellowship from this person. It is too bad to see meanness win out. In the King James Version we read, Abstain from all appearance of evil. If it even looks like it might be wrong, then we need to keep away from it. ^^^ I cant see this person above which means hes one of two people Ive blocked - because his posts are trolling redpill crap in which hes unkind and doesnt add anything useful to the conversation and just spews at people with different opinions. The modern dance places a single man and woman together in a very close and intimate way in a very public setting. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. As a woman I feel the need to enlighten some of the men here whos wives are withholding, or making it feel like pity relations. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); I want to tell you more about me and this blog. #1 would be to stay in your 1st marriage, COMMUNICATE, and do whatever work needed to make things better for the both of you. We also know that in order to be a faithful wife means meeting our husbands needs. It is impure to withhold sex from your husband. (Eccl 3:4) says there is a time to mourn and a time to dance. There was music and dancing in celebration of the prodigal son returning home (Lk 15:22-25). And vice versa. Due to this he has a memory of our marriage as our sexual chemistry being the strongest part of our relationship. As men, we tend to want direct communication early on. Yes. No hugs, kisses, no I love you and when sex was offered, it was always missionary sex on her back without so much as hmmmm, that feels good. A cautionary word for wives: one of the surest ways to destroy your husbands love for you is to play gate keeper or refuser when it comes to sexual intimacy. The answer is no. A. I havent read the comments yet, and this is going back a while. Hes giving in bed and will go down on me till I climax. At a recent party which, I and my husband both attended, we both entered the dance floor together. I made him work for it and he earned it. Honestly, at times, the only reason I didnt was because, over the years, I had put on a lot of weight and was very embarrassed of my body and not likely to be successful finding to the kind of woman I was attracted to, who would be interested in me. Confessing this helps your spouse to know you are taking the sin seriously. It is not moral to withhold it unreasonably, lest you be guilty of sinpossible even mortal sin. I literally physically crave my husband. We got along great and he was my best friend. We have had a few (seriously, only a few) big arguments that come down to me not saying enough nice things and making her feel appreciated. Quit thinking you are holy; you're not. Are progressive Christians who twist feminism into the Word. Dancing seems to fall under the same category of Christian liberty as a number of other things we have discussed on this site such as: drinking, getting a tattoo/piercing, gambling, men having long hair, etc. After she is out their for a few songs another of her friends is telling me to go dance with her and I start felling like if I dont then this guy from her class is going to go out their. I sometimes feel like she doesnt want to put any effort into the bedroom, but she put soooooo much effort into having the house sparkling clean. He did say if I wanted to leave he wouldnt stop me, but I made the mistake of staying. We need to be conforming to Christ and He continually thought of others. Even if your wife doesnt say it she will show you if shes not pleased. It was Word!!! This means that if youre withholding because he is sick or she is physically incapable and you agree to it, and you pray about, and you plan to get back together, then youre in line with this passage. I couldnt stand the natural scent of my 1st husband. Your breasts? I told him so many times that I took marriage vows before God that I would only be with him for the rest of my life. I guess Im not really even expecting a response. When I say dancing I mean socially, not educationally. Invite Him into your bedroom. I admit that I wasnt vocal about things like telling her she was beautiful or complimenting her hair or clothes, etc., but I felt like If I wanted to have sex that night, I had to start in the morning dropping all of these hints and comments for there to be a chance. My husband can keep it in his pants and take a dance for what it is, a dance. Lyft dont take it personally as attraction has nothing to do with looks. What I need to do to satisfy her changes daily. Whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God. Why become the enemy of God for a few hours of social interaction? CHRIST OVER CULTURE. However, I must point out one HUGE point regarding this: the Bible does not clearly show men and women dancing TOGETHER. I think that often times we get into issues with the texts about marriage in the Bible because were trying to find the line. This is not how we are to be as Christian women. I should also add one other element to this discussion, and that is dressing in a Godly way. We do this with the discussion of submission in marriage, where we talk more about the limits of submission than we talk about the beauty of it and how to make it work to ultimately make a marriage blossom.